The Personal & Physical Traits of Aspergers Part 1: Repetitive Routines or Rituals

I'll admit that I do a lot of things often, and in certain ways. We all have a little bit of OCD in us but people, such as myself, on the autism spectrum tend to take it further and the level of which all depends on the person. If you can recall the scene from Rain Man when Charlie took Ray's book off of the shelf and Ray started to pace around and mutter to himself. I like to think of my room/workshop as an area where I have controlled chaos. The room in particular seems to get to a level of critical mass where it stays constant and it won't get any dirtier, but the minute I clean it is when it starts the cycle all over again. if you took a picture of my clean room every day for a month on the last day it would be back to where it was before I cleaned it. I like to do something and then, once done, move on. I am not a person who stops to clean up things that are harmless, like clothes. I do dishes and if I spill something it gets taken care of right away but things that are not time sensitive get lost in the mix. "I can always do this later" I think to myself, actually I stopped thinking that all together and simply move onto the next thing. My jewelers bench in my workshop (for those of you readers who don't already know I am a profession goldsmith and have worked on many pieces with a few  in the $15,000-$25,000 range, so I take it very serious) is a complete mess but this is a little more acceptable than a dirty room. I messy bench is a busy bench, it means you have work to do so that is good thing. I know where things are so it isn't really a problem. I'd like to get more organized in there but since I am the only one using it I keep it the way I see fit. Besides work and sleep there are other things that I do with only a loose repetition, which I will explain why I use that specific term later.

Whenever I open up a new pack of chewing gum (I have been cutting back on the habit these days) I always, after taking the plastic wrap off, open the flap and take an audible whiff of the contents, much in way a person taking in the fresh air high atop a hill in springtime would. I don't care who is around when I do this and I can't say for sure when I started it, but I do it each time. I would like to use an example of something more structured that I do a lot of repetition. I have been doing Bikram Yoga for a while now and I think what I do illustrates how I feel quite well. Each class is the same postures, in the same order for about the same time, each time, all in a 105F room with around 40% humidity. The poses don't change, only your body does.

My yoga routine is very much the same each time, but with the loose repetitive nature I mentioned earlier. I arrive a half hour early and park in the same area nearest the pole I always do. I am already chewing a piece of gum at this point and I walk into the building and sort of sprint up the stairs to the third floor where the studio is. I make sure the stairs are clear before I do this as I don't want any accidents. I then enter and drop my mat down while I take my shoes off before signing in. I chat with the teacher perhaps but this may be more so after I go into the hot room and drop my mat in my spot. It is first come first serve and I like my spot, hence the reason I get there early. After that is locked up I then leave the room and talk to whoever is coming in. I do a runners stretch resting each leg, in time, on the window sill while I watch for my fellow yogis. I then return to the hot room and do some other stretches, I have a first and second (and possibly third) wave of things that I do. I make sure my nostrils are clear and fill up my big water bottle, which I had left at the entrance to the hot room,  at the filtered tap. I then go the bathroom, wet my hair and spit my gum out in the trash ( you can't have anything in your mouth when class starts). I do my final bit of stretching while I talk to whomever is near me if I feel I can add something to the conversation. Once class starts I am all business. If people are looking at me, which they are usually focused on their own practice, then they would on a couple occasions see the blank 'zombie' stare people rarely ever get to see from me. After all I am in the front row directly in front of the mirror, and everyone is looking forward. This may seem a bit odd for a person who 99% of the time prefers stealth in social situations but I have my spot in the room and I stick to it, always, and it doesn't matter if the hottest woman in the world is over on the other side (if she liked me I'm sure she would move to where I am so I don't worry about it). When it comes to lay down on our backs I seek out my fourteen boards. They are right above me and I count them, up and down being once, a total of seven times. If I mess up, I scrap that specific pass over the boards with my eyes only. I typically do four during the long break on the floor and then the last three peppered throughout the entire floor set. If I am still counting when the teacher is at one of the many points where we do a sit up I continue counting and then do the sit up, I don't like to interrupt myself for anyone. I only do, at maximum a total of ten counts of the boards and that includes mess ups; I don't let it run my life. After the class is over I lay there with everyone else and once the door is opened and closed twice, it doesn't matter how many people go out at a time, I do a thirty three second leg lift with the last four seconds (30-33) being counted three times each. I then grab my stuff and exit the studio entirely and put my mat outside the lobby and then get a piece of gum from my shorts and greedily pop it into my mouth. I take this as a reward for a class well done. I then sit down on the benches just out of the inner studio and talk with the others who are slick with sweat and looking half dead sometimes. After I feel I've cooled down enough I exit the building entirely, start my car, roll down my windows, turn the radio up and I'm off. I do not know when this routine started and I have varied it a little over the nearly four years I have been doing yoga but I like it and feel very comfortable there, even when we are packed in the studio like sardines. The thing that does set me apart from most people with OCD/others on the spectrum is that I can vary my routine and not entirely freak out about it.

I do get a little annoyed when I have planned something and then it falls apart due to something that came up but I shake it off. That is life. Long ago I learned that things can and will change or go wrong entirely, and dealing with it is a necessity. Whenever I have planned on going to a concert or some other big even I prepare in advance. I haven't had one cancelled, yet, and I am not sure how that would go; I'd probably just be mad for a little while longer than usual and move on to the next thing. You should know that when I say a while I mean an hour at most. I do have a hybrid child-like brain that can get over things quickly and shift gears rapidly. If I didn't have this trait I don't know where I would be now, but it is a mixed bag, more on that phenomenon in a later post perhaps.

As far as other things that were brought up in Rain Man, I do not eat my meals the same each night of the week, buy my underwear at K-Mart or count cards like a computer, but I do share many of the traits, just with less of an effect on my mental state. I will get to those in further posts of this series but for now I feel I have said almost enough.


Questions or Comments? Let me know.