I have touched on this subject in earlier posts but I feel like including it again here, just in case you missed it. Have you ever seen someone walking around with a blank face? It's not uncommon at all as you can sometimes catch a person deep in thought or spacing out. But, if that person happened to be me, than that would be a different story. My standard expression doesn't change much and you can't easily tell sometimes when I am happy or sad, although at other times it will be quite obvious. I can't really help that I started out as a more unemotional person and then tempered myself ever further. I don't let most small instances bother me. If someone cuts me off in traffic, I don't beep the horn especially if it was by accident. What would beeping at them do, they know they screwed up so beating a dead horse is pointless in this case. If you're really going to let simple things get in your way then you may as well give up now. Getting mad lead to feeling angry and being stressed, I don't need that one bit. So back to the matter at hand, why do I have a blank face more often then not?
The first reason is comfort. They say 'comfort is king' and I feel most comfortable with my standard facial expression the way it is. You may have heard other people on the autism spectrum tell you this next fact: Smiling feels awkward, especially when it is forced. When I laugh, I smile. When I see something heartwarming or am playing with a kitten or a puppy, I smile. When I don't need to, I don't smile. To me a smile is like making small talk; I only like to have a conversation and a genuine smile is just that, something with substance, not something pointless. The next reason I don't smile may surprise you, but you will be able to see why just as easy.
If I am mentally tired and have things out in public I need to do and there is no way around it, or I'm in a mood where I simply don't feel like talking to anyone besides the people I need to deal with, I make my face as uninviting as humanly possible. People are less apt to talk to or even approach you when you are not smiling vs. smiling. The lack of a smile is a defense mechanism for me at times. Also, I routinely wear sunglasses to the supermarket or anywhere else that has a lot of people and I need to stay there for an extended period of time. I got a comment on this blog saying something to the effect of "Oh, the sunglasses are so you can cut down the amount of visual stimulation and you won't be overwhelmed, right?" Sorry, wrong. All people/cases are different and I myself am a professional goldsmith. I work with fire daily and it can get very intense/loud, especially if I am doing platinum work which is done with a hissing jet-engine like flame at 4,000F coming out of the torch head, and before that it was learning to drive a car, which I see everything and anything on the road. So the amount of visual stimulation is not the problem. The sunglasses are so people cannot see the blank expression my eyes also have. Have you ever seen the way zombies 'stare' in older movies? Yes, it is like that. I appear to be looking through objects, not at them. If you pair that with the blank expression on my face then you have the look of say, a psycho killer. There doesn't appear to be anything going on upstairs or there may be a few too many toys in the attic. I do shop without sunglasses sometimes and the people seem to take it well, although I 'feel' they are creeped out, but that may just be mild and unnecessary paranoia.
I think I have covered what I needed to, so until next time. Next trait up: Doesn't always recognize faces right away (even close loved ones), which I am going to completely blow your mind with why this one does NOT apply to me, at all.
The first reason is comfort. They say 'comfort is king' and I feel most comfortable with my standard facial expression the way it is. You may have heard other people on the autism spectrum tell you this next fact: Smiling feels awkward, especially when it is forced. When I laugh, I smile. When I see something heartwarming or am playing with a kitten or a puppy, I smile. When I don't need to, I don't smile. To me a smile is like making small talk; I only like to have a conversation and a genuine smile is just that, something with substance, not something pointless. The next reason I don't smile may surprise you, but you will be able to see why just as easy.
If I am mentally tired and have things out in public I need to do and there is no way around it, or I'm in a mood where I simply don't feel like talking to anyone besides the people I need to deal with, I make my face as uninviting as humanly possible. People are less apt to talk to or even approach you when you are not smiling vs. smiling. The lack of a smile is a defense mechanism for me at times. Also, I routinely wear sunglasses to the supermarket or anywhere else that has a lot of people and I need to stay there for an extended period of time. I got a comment on this blog saying something to the effect of "Oh, the sunglasses are so you can cut down the amount of visual stimulation and you won't be overwhelmed, right?" Sorry, wrong. All people/cases are different and I myself am a professional goldsmith. I work with fire daily and it can get very intense/loud, especially if I am doing platinum work which is done with a hissing jet-engine like flame at 4,000F coming out of the torch head, and before that it was learning to drive a car, which I see everything and anything on the road. So the amount of visual stimulation is not the problem. The sunglasses are so people cannot see the blank expression my eyes also have. Have you ever seen the way zombies 'stare' in older movies? Yes, it is like that. I appear to be looking through objects, not at them. If you pair that with the blank expression on my face then you have the look of say, a psycho killer. There doesn't appear to be anything going on upstairs or there may be a few too many toys in the attic. I do shop without sunglasses sometimes and the people seem to take it well, although I 'feel' they are creeped out, but that may just be mild and unnecessary paranoia.
I think I have covered what I needed to, so until next time. Next trait up: Doesn't always recognize faces right away (even close loved ones), which I am going to completely blow your mind with why this one does NOT apply to me, at all.
